There’s something about the last quarter of the year that always pushes my attention toward reflection. I used to be the girl who was so focused on what she wanted to accomplish that I’d never take the time to assess my growth and progress along the way. (Not to mention I’d fail to recognize how far I’d come!) So, like clockwork, Q4 2023 has me thinking about a lot of things…
Honestly, 2023 was a tough year. Not only did I not reach most of the goals I set for myself and my business, but a part of me doesn’t even care.
I guess grief will do that to a person. I started this year with the highest of hopes—for business, for my health, and for my finances. I was just coming off a good revenue year in my business in 2022, so I was positioned to scale. I took on some extra expenses to help me grow the business. Then, the revenue dropped. I had bitten off more than I could chew. By April, I was reconsidering a lot of things. I knew there were lessons to be learned, it was just incredibly uncomfortable.
Then, at the end of April, my mom’s health took a turn for the worse. She ended up in the hospital; most of the month of May was consumed with making sure she was okay. In hindsight, what a blessing my business was slow. The amount of work I was used to was drastically reduced, and therefore my focus didn’t need to be on the business. I had to keep reminding myself that God’s plan doesn’t always align with our own.
Between June and July, things picked up a little, but nothing close to what I had intended, nor what I was used to. It was not great in the moment, but it reaffirmed to me that my focus needed to be on my mom. We ended up back in the hospital a few more times before she started home hospice, and by the beginning of August she was gone. Low and behold, business quickly picked up again. The distraction was very much welcomed, but now I’m left with no mom and goals that won’t be reached.
And you know what? It’s okay.
In 2023, I’ve learned so much about my faith, my resiliency, and my ability to handle hard things. I’ve learned that goals are great for giving you something to work towards, but they’re not an indication of how successful or happy you are as a person. I’ve learned that time is precious, and, for each of us, that time is limited. I’ve also learned that God’s will is what prevails. God’s plan is what matters. We don’t have to understand it, but we do have to put our trust and faith in Him.
So now, as we’re finishing out the last few months of 2023, I’m getting intentional with my reflection. I’m not only focusing on what did and didn’t work with my goals. I’m also focusing on how I’ve grown as a person, where I still need to grow, and how I can be stronger in my Faith.
I’m letting go of needing to control future outcomes. I’m moving in the direction I believe God wants me to go, and I have the utmost faith that my course will change direction if needed. Every day is an opportunity for me to be a better person, businessowner, partner, and friend. While the Virgo/Type A personality in me won’t let me just stop setting goals, I’m no longer focused on actually achieving them—but making sure I’m becoming the person I need to be to live the best life possible.
How are you getting intentional with your reflections of 2023? I’d love to hear what you’ve learned about yourself and what you plan to implement moving into next year.
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I’m learning that self reflection is something that needs to be done daily. I am
Coming to understand that if it doesn’t feel right then it probably isn’t right for me. Meditation and prayer is a must to keep me balances so I have to
Make time for both. I have to also constantly let go and let God because I mess myself up all the time!! But for God right!
So true! Prayer and meditation is a non-negotiable!
Thank you for sharing your journey for 2023. I am currently experiencing grief at a level I have not known it is making me look at myself, my physical well being, mental health and emotional imbalance in ways like never before. My Soul and Spiritual essence is changing and evolving at it’s own pace and my Faith is being tested yet my peace is the only thing holding me together and God’s Grace reminds me, my transformation isn’t when I want it be. It is when he feels I’m ready for it to happen. I know that I have finally recognized what I have accomplished and can be proud of myself. I don’t have to rush back into defining what needs to be done. I can wholeheartedly wait for God’s blessings to arrive to me and through me.
You’re spot on – it’s not on our timeframe, it’s on His timeframe! We can do this!!
That was inspiring. I have Sickle Cell and get monthly transfusions, was put on hold by my job I worked since 2014…we have a new supervisor who spends more time getting rid of people she doesn’t like. I guess she finally found a chance to get rid of me for now; supposedly, I am being placed in Outreach. That was August 15, 2023. Since then I face eviction every month, a long with my other bills. A good friend has been helping me but should have to since their is some one with me.
It has been challenging with my son having issues with his trait, taking him back and forth to the ER, doctor, and the GI doctor. It resulted in him having to be placed in a grade recovery school and the nightmare continues on.
I haven’t focused on my writing in weeks due to all of this…I gave myself a deadline but with my family…it will not be met. Most of the time I get sick is because of them putting all the burn on me. Sometimes I want to give up.
Reading what you shared gives me a little hope of holding on and staying focused on my dreams: a home of my own, getting my 4 businesses off the ground and the others- I want to put people to work. And to finally breathe easily. I may never be cured but I can cope.
I’m sending you so many well wishes – you’re going through a lot but when you come out on the other side, it’s all going to be worth it!
You might be undergoing some fiery trials or tests. I can feel the burdens weighing you down. Strength recognizes strength. Just keep on holding. Pray specifics for yourself like to already have them. Take a stance and unload at the feet of the Master. This too shall pass. Believe it.
Lost my mom in September after a few weeks of illness, very similar to your story. I also lost my job in September due to a re-org. I know God is speaking to me, your message is further confirmation. The harder life gets is the closer we draw to God, He is all we have and all we need. My sister and I have adopted “never alone” as our mantra. May you also feel never alone. God is with you.
Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you for sharing that Tiffany and sending condolences on the loss of your mom – so hard to go through.
This was powerful and enlightening to read. My 2023 was a devastating year infidelity and divorce. But I relied on my faith in Jehovah and his grace to protect me and never leave me alone. I’m stronger now than ever. Draw close to God he will draw close to you. James 4;8 thank you for your encouragement
Wow, it’s so nice to know I’m not alone in the struggles of life. Sending you all the well wishes – so happy to hear your faith hasn’t waivered.
I’ve learned that making memories with those you love, is what last
I definitely agree with that.
Very interesting, I’ve learned if you ever want to hear God laugh tell him your plans, I think He, God has a weird sense of humor. I to am a Virgo and time after time in 2023 I have God to remove this thorn in my side, and just as he answered Paul, I get the same response My Grace is sufficient for you. Finally I just gave it to God and told Him it’s Yours and I am here to tell you He is working it out.
Absolutely love that. I think God has an interesting sense of humor as well. It’s not what we want. It’s what He wants for us.
I’m staying prayerful about my 2024 life plans, as I’m not sure what God is going to do, and what He’s doing now as I type this message. I’ve made plans but some haven’t happened at all. It’s like He is silent, watching how I will respond in my current state. I need help paying my November rent (or else), I don’t have a job (looking for almost 2 years); recovering from surgery and another procedure. I’m not making excuses, but I don’t know what to do, I’m just taking one moment at a time.
I think one moment at a time is a good approach, especially when things are unknown. This is where faith can play a huge role. Stay closer to Him!
Thank you for your transparency, vulnerability, and empowerment through your message. As all of the other sisters have stated, it is inspiring and confirming. Life is definitely life-ing and we become so consumed with the tangibles and when they no longer serve us, we are left with an emptiness that pierces the soul. This has been a very testing year for me, but God is calling me to be greater and so I am learning it’s not the blessing or how he will help me to overcome that he wants me to focus on, but the Faith in Him that he will do it. Thanks for that reassuring confirmation. As a fellow virgo, I understand that analytical mind, but we have to take it one day at a time. He says “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind”. Daily we have to pray for his purpose and guidance for our lives.
I had similar experience this year. My husband was in and out of the hospital in May and June. By July was placed on hospice he had passed away. I ‘d all but stop working my business. I used my time to reflect and reset. I am still working on me. It is good reading that someone else experienced grief and is managing to reassess what things are important. May God continue to bless and guide you. Thank you for sharing.