I grew up thinking that my father passed away when I was a baby. When filling out paperwork for school or at a doctor’s office, I would write “deceased” in the father section of the form. My mom never talked to me about my dad. She never said anything to me about him, ever. I did not even know his name. Around the time I was in junior high school, I asked my oldest sister (who knew a lot about our family history) if she knew about my father, what his name was, etc. She did not know but encouraged me to ask our mother about him. I was apprehensive at first because, after all, it was a sensitive subject. Shortly after that conversation with my sister, I developed enough courage to ask my mother about my dad. I asked her what his name was, how she met him, and what he looked like. She responded that he looked just like me, that he was tall, that she met him at the military base near where we lived, and she told me his first and last name. She didn’t know much else about him. She said she didn’t ask him any questions. Shortly after I was born, she said he left the military base near us in Virginia and was stationed at another location out of state.
At the age of 15, I began searching for my father. I wrote to the Oprah Winfrey Show because in the late 80s, Oprah was reuniting lots of families and individuals who were searching for loved ones and so I thought if anyone could find my father, it would be Oprah! I received a postcard in the mail from Harpo Studios acknowledging my letter but nothing beyond that. I continued my search in the early 90’s with the help of a book I purchased on how to find anyone, anywhere. I wrote to the Army Military Personnel Center with all the information that I had to provide, which was his name (spelled the way it sounded when my mother told me my father’s name – Eline Michael), my birthdate, and the name of the local military base where he was stationed at the time of my birth. I received a response back by mail indicating they were unable to identify a record of military service based on the information I provided.
Many years passed but I never gave up on my desire to find my father. I yearned to know if, in fact, he was actually deceased or not. Could he still be alive? If so, does he know I exist? I had so many questions. Fast forward to 2018, when my husband encouraged me to register with 23 and Me to see if there may be a match. I felt it was a long shot but I submitted my 23 and Me kit. The immediate results did not reveal any close matches. I received periodic emails from 23 and Me indicating I had new DNA relatives available to view. I would log in to look sometimes, but most of the time I would ignore the emails, thinking that I would just be disappointed again.
In early 2021, I was talking with a close friend from high school about heritage. She was sharing her 23 and Me results and that pushed me to log back into my 23 and Me account to see if there was anything new. There was!
When I saw that I had a 7% match with someone, my heart dropped and I was filled with anticipation! I had matched with a person whose last name sounded like my father’s last name, although it was spelled differently than I had been spelling it in my search for him. I Googled the name using the spelling that I saw in my 23 and Me profile and my father’s name appeared in the search, along with an address and a phone number! I don’t think I have ever been that excited and nervous to make a phone call in my entire life. On my third attempt to call, I reached someone—my father’s wife—who answered affirmatively to all of the questions I asked her. She was so nice, so understanding, supportive, and just a pleasure to talk to. To learn that I finally found my father and that he is alive was the best day of my life, next to giving birth to my son.
In August 2021, my family and I flew to Georgia so that I could meet my father in person. In the midst of a pandemic, this was definitely a highlight for me during such a devastating time in the world. The week I spent with him, my step-mom, and my siblings, was nothing short of amazing. While it may be impossible to make up 53 years, I am enjoying sharing love with my father and my paternal family through many, many phone calls, FaceTime sessions, text messages, and the exchange of pictures and as many in-person visits as possible. What if I had given up? What if I did not remain faithful and steadfast? This experience has been a true testament to perseverance, patience, and faithfulness. Never give up on the desires of your heart.
What are you looking for out there? Could you be close to finding it?
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Great story.
Thanks so much.
Amazing perseverance! I’m sure you father was excited to see you, and what a blessing to have a stepmother who encouraged and embraced this reunion!
Congratulations on your family connection. I have a similar story although I only went through ancestry.com.
This is such an amazing story
I am so excited for you ! I am a member of ancestry and have found family connections that we would have never know if it weren’t for the ancestry and one my cousin to find out we had another uncle!
That was a beautiful story.
Thanks so much.
that was a good read.. sounds something like my story.. but i am much older.. my mother met my father at a uso dance. in 1940.. i did met him a few times .. when i was grown… but i know nothing about his family… my youngest daughter has been doing ancestry and did find some cousin on my fathers side…
Such a beautiful journey . . . thank you for sharing with us and encouraging us to honor the desires of our hearts, xoxo
Wow!!! What an amazing journey to finding your father. I would love to know what was his reaction, did he know he had a daughter, I’m so intrigued. If you’ve shared your full story elsewhere, please let me know, I’d like to read it in its entirety. Kudos to you for never giving up!! I know so many stories similar to yours and it’s heartbreaking.
He was extremely happy and excited when we first spoke by phone and equally as much, if not more, when we met in person. I may one day expand on the story. Thank you for the encouragement :).
What a heartwarming story. I’m so happy for you!!
I’m extremely over the moon happy for you. After 52 years, I found my birth daughter. She was doing quite well for the first time in one hell of a long time I didn’t have to worry I asked God to take care of her, and God did.
Oh wow! What a blessing! Congratulations to you both!!
I think it’s great that you found your father and have reconnected. You have inspired me to do 23 and me to find my birth family.
I’m sending positive thoughts and high hopes for favorable matches and connections occur! 🙂
I am so happy that you were able to connect with your father. I also searched for years to connect with my birth father. I wish you peace and joy as you add this new chapter in your life.
Holding back the tears as I read your story. A story of love, bravery, commitment, excitement, anticipation, persistence, faith…. So proud of you and very happy that you were blessed to find your Father. And even more happy that you all have developed a wonderful relationship. May this story give hope and determination to many who have been in search of their love ones. Love you my sister…Y
Thanks so much Sister! 🙂
I am so happy for you. I found out who my father was 2 years ago on my birthday which was the same day of his funeral. I now have a brother and a little sister. I was hurt because everyone else knew he was my dad except for me. I believe all children should know who their parents and siblings are.
Hello mom I am so proud of you for coming forward to take a stand and find your father.
Thank you son!
This is beautiful
I am so happy for you. Everyone deserves to know where they come from. I’m so glad that your paternal family was so welcoming. Your stepmom mom sounds like an amazing mom. I know this wasn’t easy for your mom but she sounds equally amazing. She put your desire to know your dad ahead of any unpleasant memories or feelings that she had. You are blessed to have answers and to be surrounded by acceptance and love. To be surrounded by a mom who did the most, in raising an amazing woman, your maternal family and now your paternal family is nothing short of amazing. Every child deserves your happy ending.
Thank you so much Andrea. That was beautiful! 🙂
Simplicity a story of persistence and perseverance that ultimately rewarded a patiently lady her most life desire by faith.
Good Afternoon Fonda. I am the sister of your new found sister Tracy. This story is so inspiring to me. I also want to find my father. I was born and my mother never told him she was pregnant. I also just found out that my mother was my mother just 10 years ago. My Auntie raised me. Thank you for your story.
Hi Cynthia! It warms my heart that you are inspired by the story. I’m sending positive thoughts and encouragement that you will find your father as well! 🙂
Oh, Fonda, what a beautiful story! Thank you for having the courage to share it!
Thanks Melissa! 🙂