As my mother worked tirelessly to keep our bellies full and our home immaculate, and our dad worked long hours to build our family business, Polote Construction, LLC., Denise, Benji, and I spent our days the way most kids did back then: playing outside (until the streetlights came on). During those sweltering Savannah summers in the 1970s, I remember the love and safety I felt in the time spent with my big sister, Denise, and my baby brother, Benji. I also remember Denise doing her best to keep the three of us out of trouble.

 “Benji, Cheryl! Y’all come on, now! We are gonna be in big trouble if we don’t get back to the house…and fast!” warned Denise as we scrambled back home before Mama noticed that we were gone.

You see, Mama specifically told us not to leave the front yard, but we insisted on sneaking around the corner. So of course, being the oldest—and our second mom—Denise had to get us back in line! Benji still calls her ‘sister-mama’ to this day.

My heart overflows with joy and gratitude as I remember us, the Polote kids, running around ‘footloose and fancy-free,’ as we used to say. While we had no idea back then, those days we spent playing outside solidified the deep connection we share now. Our unbreakable bond has played a critical role in the woman I am today. I especially value the nuances of my relationships with my siblings, individually and collectively. Though each relationship is unique, they share a common thread of unconditional love and support, free of judgment.

My sister, Denise, is a God-fearing woman, but she does not play about me! One of my fondest memories is when I told her about a close friend who betrayed my trust. Her response? “You finish crying and praying while I go get them all the way together!” Denise often travels with me and serves as a voice of reason in my life. She has always prioritized showing up for me when I need her. For example, I was on bed rest with each of my three children. Each time, Denise came to help take care of me and my babies. I can always lean on her sound wisdom and I find deep comfort in her prayers for me. Denise is her sister’s keeper (and she was long before it was a trend).

My baby brother, Benji, is my safe place. I know that I can call Benji and rely on his judgment-free, listening ear. He is also quick to lovingly correct me when necessary. He has always let me know that I can tell him anything, not just with his words but also with his actions. Benji and I are deeply connected. He knows and can sense when something is wrong before I even tell him. Having this kind of love from my brother is one of the greatest gifts I have been given and I don’t take it for granted.

Now that we are grown and can no longer spend our summers playing outside under the streetlights on Arcadian Street, I am proud of the fact that even with our busy lives, grown children, and hectic schedules, we remain intentional about staying close and spending quality time with one another. It brings me profound joy that Denise and Benji still work for our family business, continuing the legacy that my father began now 50 years ago. To ensure that we stay connected, we plan—and look forward to—our annual sibling trips! There is nothing better than when the three of us are together, laughing (until we cry), finishing each other’s sentences, and exchanging ideas. Prioritizing our time together enhances the quality of my life and provides me with a rich emotional safety that is simply invaluable—and irreplaceable. When the world grieves me, Benji & Denise uplift me by sending me scriptures and words of encouragement. When I am feeling sad or discouraged, they find ways to make me laugh. Oh, and the sibling group chat…let’s just say—it’s LIT!

Sis, when is the last time you checked in with your sibs? While we don’t need a national holiday to tell them that we love them, I find it to be the perfect reminder to do so. If you don’t already have a sibling group chat, I challenge you to start one now. I encourage you to be the forerunner who takes intentional action to foster a deeper connection with them. Sis, are you sending that text today?