What is it about women and us wanting to make everyone happy? Seriously, I see it all the time – with myself, my friends, and my clients – we’re constantly putting other people’s needs and feelings above our own. We make sure everyone else is okay, leaving our own happiness on the backburner. What good does this do anyone? If we can’t fill our own cup, how can we fill someone else’s?

I think the older I get, the more I understand the importance of prioritizing ME! In every aspect. Myself, my body, my peace, my happiness, and my self-love. This year, I’ve made a conscious effort to start prioritizing me. I recently shared how I’ve set specific goals to make sure my body and health are taken care of. Now, I want to share how I’m protecting my peace and fostering self-love.

I just recently understood the sacredness of my personal peace (after 35 years that’s a shame, but here we are). A friend had recommended a book to me, The Celestine Prophecy, and it opened my eyes to the exchanges of energy. I would wonder why I always felt depleted mentally and emotionally after spending long periods of time with certain people, then I realized they were taking my energy to build theirs up. Have you ever felt drained after hanging out with a specific friend or family member? They were likely taking your energy.

Now that I’m conscious of energy exchange, I limit my time and interactions with people, places, and things that drain my energy. I also set firm boundaries on protecting my mental wellbeing, and while it’s not always easy, it does get better over time. My peace has never been more protected!

Another way I’m prioritizing me is by fostering self-love through taking care of myself (AKA self-care). I’ve spent a good amount of time identifying the things that make me truly happy. Some of those things cost nothing at all, others require some intentional money management. But now that I know this, I can move forward accordingly.

One thing I’ve learned to love is starting my day outside, walking to the sunrise. This brings such a sense of peace and contentment to my life. I start every weekday (unless it’s raining or snowing), at a local park that offers views of a lake, trees, and occasional animals.

In addition to getting outside, I prioritize self-care on a regular basis by treating myself to iced coffees. It’s so simple, but iced coffees (that I don’t have to make) bring me so much joy! I’ve started factoring in money into my monthly budget to enjoy a café-style iced coffee 2-3 times a week. Now, I will say that I tried to make my own iced coffee at home…IT WAS TERRIBLE! It brought me no joy! That’s why I budget for it! I may skip the nail salon, but I won’t skip my iced coffees!

Finally, I’m very mindful of the words I say and the promises I keep to myself. I value being a person who does what they say they’re going to do. If I tell myself (or someone else) that I’m going to do something, it will get done. I don’t break promises to myself. I’ve always been pretty good about this, but I just recently became intentional with it. It not only feels like a character strength, but it truly makes me feel like I love and care for myself (which I do)!

While it’s easy to keep promises to myself, it’s not as easy to make sure I only say kind things to myself. Numerous times, I’ve caught myself saying “Ugh, your stomach pokes out too much” or “You look too frumpy today.” When I catch myself saying mean things to myself, I always try to counter the original negative thought. I may think my stomach is poking out, but then I’ll remind myself that I move my body daily. I may think I look frumpy, but then I’ll tell myself that today I’m valuing comfort. This is a much tougher habit for me, but as part of my process for prioritizing me, I’m putting it front and center!

If we can’t make our own selves happy, who will? If we don’t prioritize ourselves, who will? Let’s vow to put ourselves first as we navigate this life we live. I’d love to know – what makes you happy? How do you make sure you prioritize those things and yourself? Drop a comment to let me know!