This new year, I’m telling y’all, I am speaking marriage over my life, ‘cause, real talk, there comes a moment when a woman stops pretending that she is fine with “almost” relationships and surface-level love. There comes a time when a woman finally admits the truth her heart feels: I am ready to be married.

And I’m telling y’all, I am ready to be married. And I mean that with my whole soul. I am ready for partnership. I am ready for purpose. I am ready for covenant. I am ready for the life God has been slowly preparing me for.

For so long, I have been known as the “strong” one. The “resilient” one. The one who holds everything together even when it all feels shaky. I even told myself I was good. I told myself I was focused on my dreams. I told myself I did not need to be married. Yes, I am focused, I am building, and I am strong. But that does not erase the fact that desire is still there. The longing is still real — that quiet wish to be loved deeply and consistently. It does not disappear just because I have adjusted to standing on my own two feet. 

I spent years pouring into relationships, and now I’m left wondering when the return on my investment will come. I poured loyalty into the unloyal. I poured faith into the hopeless. I have prayed and been the wholesome girlfriend. Meanwhile, everybody around me has their person. My parents are married. My siblings are married. My friends are married.

I love seeing people in love, but I would be lying if I said there weren’t moments when I sat there like, “God, hello? Am I invisible? Why is my seat still empty? Why do I feel like the only one still standing in the hallway waiting for my name to be called?” 

I want a husband. Not just another long-term relationship with a boyfriend. Not confusion. Not mixed signals. Just a husband — a man who will see me as his forever. 

And, let me be very clear: I do not chase love. This is not me begging for attention. I will not shrink myself, hoping someone will choose me. Wanting marriage does not make me desperate. It makes me aligned with who I truly am. I am not waiting to be picked; I am waiting to be matched. I am waiting for the man whose spirit recognizes mine.

Sometimes, I sit and wonder why God has me waiting this long. I am patient. I am obedient. But, Lord, this desire is loud. It’s not the waiting that hurts; it’s wanting something I cannot yet have. Ladies, do you ever just sit there like, “Where is my man at?” Don’t you just feel like he is somewhere out there in the world, breathing air, eating snacks, and living his life while we’re over here passing every emotional exam God throws our way?

I feel like I’ve graduated from girlfriend university. I have mastered it. I’m a valedictorian. A summa cum laude partner. A true scholar. I am a whole professor in loyalty and ride or die spirit. It feels like I have taken every class and turned in every assignment.

No more courses, God. I’m ready for the diploma — hand me my husband, please. 

At the end of the day, I know this desire for marriage is not a weakness. It’s a calling. It’s evidence that my heart is prepared. I am ready for love that chooses me. I am ready for love that grows with me. I am ready for love that matches my heart.

I am ready for my husband — and these words are proof I am no longer afraid to say that out loud. Someday, when he finally arrives, everything about this journey will make sense.

Sis, who or what are you waiting for this new year? What affirmations do you need to speak out loud to remind yourself that you are worthy of love?