My brother and I grew up in Austin, Texas, but our parents were from Rochester, New York. When we were little (I’m talking infants), my parents would take us to be with our extended family every summer. When my brother and I got old enough to survive without our parents, our dad would drop us off in Rochester and leave us with his side of the family for all of June and July. Then, mom would pick us up and we’d spend a few days with her and her side of the family before heading back home to Texas.

Let me give you some backstory. At that time, none of my dad’s five siblings had left Rochester. That meant we had a lot of family around when ever we’d visit. When my brother and I would stay in Rochester, we were joined by a plethora of cousins, all about the same age as we were. We all slept at my grandmother’s house, and it was like a non-stop slumber party.

Not only was this time with extended family special, but it was very different from the time spent with friends back in Austin. My brother and I are both bi-racial, and we didn’t encounter a lot of diversity when growing up in the suburb of Austin. Spending time with our Black side of the family during our summers in Rochester helped us connect to our roots and our dad’s side of the family.

In Rochester, we had family barbecues and cookouts. We would take family trips to local theme parks like the Seabreeze Amusement Park and Six Flags Darrien Lake. We went to neighborhood functions and made our way through the houses of all our family members. There was never a dull moment because there was always something to do and someone to see. I let my memories take me back to those days and I pay special attention to how my dad was. You could tell there was a certain peace that overcame him when visiting the house he grew up in. It was always so interesting to see both my dad and mom navigate a city other than Austin.

Being away for months at a time did leave my brother and I feeling a little homesick, but we still looked forward to those summers in Rochester. Then, we reached high school. And, with everyone growing up and getting deeper into their own lives, the trips faded away. Thankfully, we were able to connect with all of our family online. It’s not the same as seeing people in person, but it definitely helps when you want to keep up with everyone.

I’ve been back to Rochester maybe three or four times in my adulthood, and I still feel like I did when I was ten years old. When it comes to family, no matter how much time has passed, it always feels like you pick up where you left off. That’s because family roots run deep. Even still, I want to make more time for familial connections. Both of my parents have passed away and, besides my brother, my extended family members in Rochester are the only physical link I have with my parents. It means something.

Now that I’m an adult, I have the means to get to Rochester on my own. I have the resources to visit family when I please and when I get invited to the family reunions! Moving into this next season of life, I plan on making sure I stay connected to where and who I come from. I plan on making frequent returns and spending quality time with the family members I spent so much of my childhood summers with. Someday, if I have my own children, I plan to take them to the same places I cherish. I want them to feel that connection I have, the kind of connection that never seems to leave you . . . because family roots run deep.

Whether we choose to deepen our current familial connections or plant seeds to cultivate future family roots, the comfort and unconditional love that fosters as a result is something we all need. So, stay connected, Sis. It means something.

Were you close with your extended family when growing up? How deep do your family roots run? If you find your family roots aren’t as deep as you’d like, maybe they can start with you! Be the seed for future generations! I’d love to hear about your family dynamics, so drop a comment to share!