Lately, those “Good Morning” and “I Love You” messages have been hitting different.

Let me explain.

Over the years, my career consumed any time that I had. I also spent a significant amount of time attempting to date. As a result, I left my friendships by the wayside and I did little to nourish those relationships. One day, I was ranting and raving about dating, telling myself that it’d be impossible to have another long-term relationship. Then, I heard as clear as day: “Love Me. Love the people you have in your life.” I took to heart this message of truth. So now, I am trying to do better about texting my sister-friends.

Depending on the day, I might send a message and share my morning devotion. Sometimes, I randomly text some of my sister-friends in the middle of the day and say, “Sis, I love you.” God’s timing is impeccable, because there have been a few times when those, “I love you,” or, “I thought of you,” messages came through for me and helped me push on through the day.

I also try to be intentional with spending time with these special people. Many of my sister-friends have families and mile-long to-do lists. Some of them are a quick car ride away and others are across the country. What a fulfilling experience when we are finally able to spend time together. We talk about life. We try to replay highlight reels from the past few years. We admit that life is messy — that we are overwhelmed and still do not think we are doing enough. We share memories from the past that give a peek into our younger years.

As we know, some of the trips never make it out of the group chat. Sometimes, we cannot coordinate dates, or the budget is not in the budget or, of course, life happens. So a few months turn into a year, two years, four years, or longer.

I remember having a scheduling conflict that prevented me from meeting up with sister-friends for a weekend in Sedona. Though I could only fly in on Saturday afternoon, I knew I would at least be able to spend Sunday with my sister-friends. I questioned if I was really about to hop on a flight to essentially spend about twenty-four hours in Sedona. I was so glad I did. We went to the movies for the first time as a group and had brunch.

We use countless apps throughout the workday to squeeze in one meeting after the next. We need to use the same energy and strategy to reconnect with our sister-friends. Pick the weekend. Visit each other at home. Being on an island with no cries for “Mommy!” would be great but we cannot continue to wait for the Instagrammable trips.

When time and resources permit, I try to visit those friends who have more challenges and less flexibility to travel as I do. I am finally meeting all the other people who take up space in the lives of my sister-friends.

My sister-friend Alecia always reminds me to allow people to love on me and fill my cup back up. Recently, my sister-friend Tan came to visit. I got up early to get my hair braided. I returned home and she finished my laundry and tidied the kitchen up. I was speechless. I am typically the host that does the most — but not lately. I have asked for grace when sister-friends visit the house when it is not quite photo ready . . . and I have extended grace to myself for not having the chance to put together cute welcome packages.

Shawndrika and Jennifer also visited the same weekend. As I waited for them to arrive, I took Tan to my local nail salon — the kind of nail salon where they know everyone’s name. These might not be Instagram-worthy moments, but they are necessary moments to rest, reset, and refuel through cherished relationships.

All of this to say . . . tell your people you love them. Do not wait until a special occasion to send the standard, “Merry Christmas! I love you!” messages. Take the short soulful trips when the calendars align just right. Create opportunities to connect. If that person crosses your mind, reach out. Your message might just be the one that tips their day in a different direction.