If there is one thing I am going to be, it’s for real. Sometimes it feels like women, especially Black women in this era, have been low-key trained to compete like there’s only one folding chair at the table and we all gotta fight for it. The fake love, the quiet comparisons, the, “I see you, Sis!” all while giving a side-eye on Instagram and Facebook? Tired.

Truthfully, the comparison and competition are blocking our blessings to build something powerful and unbreakable. We can’t get to The Promised Land if we’re too busy trying to outshine each other! The real glow-up starts when we stop competing for crumbs and start baking the whole cake together. Can I please get a witness?

Real talk, this generation needs a very loud and obnoxious reminder: Our ancestors didn’t move mountains by going solo dolo. Black women have always been about community, have always been about the fabric that holds us all together. We have been about sisterhood and about lifting women up as we climb. Our ancestors weren’t gatekeeping, they were opening doors for their daughters and their daughters’ daughters. Championing other women ain’t some new trend — it’s our God given birthright. So, let’s stop acting brand new and start moving like the legacy we come from.

This is exactly why I have so much respect for my mentor, Valeisha, or “V” as I call her. Valeisha always shows up with grace, especially when it comes to supporting other Black women. She doesn’t just talk about sisterhood, and you can check her résumé because my girl walks it. Because of her mindset — her heart-first leadership — Valeisha has moved mountains working for top-notch administrations, all while running her own media company like the boss she is.

But, here’s the part that gets good. Even with all those accolades, she’s still lifting other women as she climbs. Still passing mics. Still showing love without ego. That’s not just mentorship — that’s legacy in real time.

My mentor Valeisha is, without question, our ancestors’ wildest dream. She is what and how I aspire to be. Imagine walking in purpose and breaking barriers while also making space for the rest to shine, too? It’s not that difficult to do when your heart is solid.

I’ll never forget the moment Valeisha called on me to moderate a conversation with a Hollywood film producer and director. What made it surreal was how it happened. Valeisha was originally set to moderate the conversation herself. But, literally five minutes before showtime, she turned to me and said, “Shy, you got this.”

No warning. No prep. Just vibes and trust.

Here’s the thing: I was ready for the opportunity. I was trained to stay camera-ready, mic-ready, life-ready. I’d been taught to never wait to get ready but to always be ready. So, when she tossed me that alley-oop? Y’all know me! As true as any Leo, I dunked it.

Real talk, Valeisha makes me feel encouraged and supported every step of the way. This matters to me because there were many times in this industry where folks have told me they’d remember my name but few have actually followed through by pulling up a seat for me at the table. Being thought of and considered is cool . . . but being included and called upon? That’s everything.

When Valeisha passed me the mic and let me lead, she showed me what every Black woman deserves and what every Black woman should be. A sister, mentor, advisor, and amplifier . . . all-in-one. Not a competitor nor a critic, but a cushion, shield, and collaborator. Whether dropping gems about navigating relationships with men and mindsets, inviting me over for dinner on Resurrection Sunday when I am far from home, or simply texting “I see you” when I post a win — no matter what it is, Valeisha’s looking out for me helps me feel supported — spiritually and professionally.

Petty energy just can’t compete with divine assignment. When you’re moving in real purpose, tables get longer, rooms get brighter, seats multiply, and blessings? The blessings definitely get bigger.

So, basically, the moral of the story is that before you dim another Queen’s light to make yours shine brighter, ask yourself: Would the ancestors approve? Sis, whatever your answer, this is your chance to check it at the door and go get healed. We are so much better for ourselves — and for others — when we are playing on the same team, adjusting each other’s crown.

Name a time you helped another Black woman level up, step forward, or feel seen. Or, share a story of a time when another Black woman helped you level up!